Susan Jennifer Polese

One of the most daunting challenges I find as a mental health counselor working in a domestic violence and sexual assault agency is having patience – patience with clients who are resistant to change. And, boy, so many are.

The BBC reports this morning that 20-year-old Jordan Sheard has been sentenced to three and a half years in jail for the death of Steven Simpson after pleading guilty to manslaughter charges. Simpson, 18, died one day after sustaining "significant burns" in June 2012, according to the report. The dead boy – who had epilepsy and Asperger’s - had been humiliated at a party, endured anti-gay rants, was set on fire and killed.

Busy with internship and last stretch of graduate school. Trying to keep family going smoothly while earning some money. Might as well be turning water into wine or tin into gold. Wanna write – need to write – not writing.

I am interning as a domestic violence and sexual assault counselor. The work is challenging and difficult, but rewarding. I’ve noticed one thing, however – Ever want to stop the conversation on a dime at a cocktail party? - just mention that you are a domestic violence and sexual assault counselor. While out trying to relax and have fun at a party I have tried to give the pat answer of “I am a counselor” in response to the inevitable question, “What do you do?” – but I can’t keep my passion down and I need to share what I am actually doing for a living and what I am so passionate about it. I am often faced with a blank stare or a “I could never do that kind of work,” and this is often the end of the conversation. Don’t get me wrong! Occasionally I do get an interested conversation partner and we have a great exchange and we both learn something from each other (don’t you just love when that happens?) But usually after I say what I do all that fills the air is the sound of crickets.

The old boy has been disavowed throughout the ages. But we all owe him and extra thank you – not only for providing the rich fodder for truly wonderful Woody Allen films, but for giving us the juicy concepts of regression, sublimation, denial – and my favorite (for the purposes of this blog post): countertransference. Yes, I am talking about Freud, the father of psychoanalysis, who even the most devoted of psychoanalytic therapists say was, well – just plain wrong in the majority of his assumptions and his approach to mental health.