Robert Jackman 

How many times have you thought – I don’t want to say no because I don’t want them to be mad at me. Or, I don’t want to hurt them if I tell him or her no. This is the language of the conflict avoider, the peacemaker, the I just want everyone to get along person.

When we are younger and have an emotional reaction to a situation it can often feel overwhelming. If we have a positive nurturing support system we are consoled and our feelings are validated. Or on the other hand, maybe we were told to stop crying, don’t be angry and stop your bellyaching. So many people who see me will say they received mixed messages about their feelings when they were younger. They were told to stop crying, but then they were asked why are you so quiet, why don’t you tell us what’s wrong?

So often when we are in physical, mental or emotional pain it feels overwhelming. We begin to become consumed by the pain and it becomes all we can think about even when we try to distract ourselves away from the pain.

I wish I didn’t do that, Why did I do that?, What was I thinking?? Regret is looking back over your life and wishing you had done something , said something or changed something about whatever it is that you did, and you know you can’t go back and re-do it. This silent movie plays over and over tormenting you like a bully in your head teasing a victim.

Many people either feel regretful or resentful about the past, or they worry about the future. Today I will talk about worry.