Natosha Monroe

Ah, Valentine’s Day. What does February 14th mean to you this year? A day of romance and passion with a person you love? A day of ignoring the fact that you don’t have a date? A day of pining away over someone who apparently doesn’t love you back? A day of spending time with someone new and special? A day of being annoyed at the commercialization of love? A day of hoping to meet another’s expectations? A day ended with a content sigh of relief as you rest your head beside your soul mate? Or is it just a day that falls between Sunday and Tuesday?

Since I’ve returned from Afghanistan, I’ve been asked numerous times to comment on reports of large quantities of medications being dispensed to Troops both overseas and back home: medications related to psychological matters. And so I am going to give my honest opinion among people I feel will understand where I’m coming from. Based solely on my personal observations and experiences shared to me by fellow Veterans, our Troops are being “treated” with too many pills and not enough actual therapy. And their “treatment” is often unacceptable. There. I said it. And you’ve surely noticed it too—unless you are among the throngs of “professionals” who are simply tossing pills and calling it a therapeutic session. Ok. So what do we do about this?

In graduate school I learned that happy, fulfilling relationships exist when people prioritize and care about the happiness of others more than their own. Particularly in romantic relationships, this must be evident in both people in the relationship, not just one of them. This makes sense when I reflect upon my recent deployment to Afghanistan, conversations with returning Veterans, and previous therapeutic interactions because I can’t help but notice relationship issues revolving around the theme of egocentrism. So I have to ask: Are the most recent generations doomed to strained, unfulfilling relationships due to the increasingly popular egocentric mindset?

What could motivate someone to jump at the chance to join a group of strangers for the duration of their favorite holiday? To show up in the wee hours of the morning in a jam-packed, standing-room-only terminal for a 5-hour wait for a flight? To stay awake night and day for 3 days? To travel over four countries on three continents?

Well, the time has come for me to end my deployment here in Afghanistan and return home to the States. This is a move I have mixed emotions about, but am looking forward to making so I can continue my life in the “real-world.” When on a deployment, it feels as though life back home is on “pause” just waiting for that final homecoming flight that will push “play,” causing everything to resume from the freeze frame. But in reality this isn’t the case at all—it only feels that way to those of us who have been deployed—which is a strange concept to truly grasp. In reality, everything and everybody in our lives back home have been in motion the entire time we’ve been away, it seems, without us. This is a feeling I’ve experienced and am prepared for. Without giving details, I’ll soon be flying to Kuwait, then to Europe where we’ll stop for a while, then to Ft. Benning, Georgia where I will out-process. My Christmas Eve and Christmas Day will be unique and memorable as most of my journey home will literally and figuratively take place during the holidays.