Judy Belmont

In my clinical psychology graduate program with its psychoanalytic orientation back in the 70‘s, I was taught that therapy largely was focused on uncovering how your past was still present in everyday life. The mindset at the time was that only by shedding light on deep seated issues can a person move past what had made them stuck, with increased insight and understanding. I only learned about Cognitive Behavior Therapy after graduate school, and was amazed at how just changing one’s self talk one can really change lives and happiness quotient. However, in my practice i found that even was not enough. Insight into thinking patterns alone does not change things, especially if habits are deeply ingrained. Sometimes, “knowing better” does not mean that we can actually “do better.” If so, we would all be exercising regularly and trim and fit! For many clients, some no matter how much they identify their irrational thoughts and know how they can replace them with more rational ones, they remain stuck. Why? They have no new skills to act differently!

It is funny how our clients all know that life is not fair, but still they expect it to be! It is one thing to know intellectually that life is not fair, but another thing to give up the sense of entitlement and expectations that it should in our day to day lives. Sometimes it seems so hard to help them change their ingrained habits of thinking!

Almost three years ago, when Bernis Madoff was discovered to have bilked investors of billions of dollars in an elaborate Ponzi scheme, the disbelief and anger as the stunned world looked on was shocking. The ones most in shock were those who felt “lucky” enough to invest with Bernie Madoff. Wealthy people, including celebrities, found their own nest egg or the money for their foundations completely wiped out. However, the one who was the most tragic casualty was his own son, Mark, who took his life 2 years to the day after his father’s arrest.

When Steve Jobs died, I became fascinated with news about him. Almost all the news depicted a visionary, a genius, a man who was compared to the likes of Einstein and Edison - and with good reason. He was an inventor, a creative and forward thinker, and he transformed the world of computer technology, film and music. His innovations have affected billions of people around the globe, and his "user friendly" technology has made life so much easier for the average person. With his brilliance and ability to be a true visionary, he made it possible for so many of us to use technology in a way that is intuitive and easy.