ACA MEMBER BLOGS

At my internship in our IOP, we offer a new class on spirituality, meaning and values. The clinicians around us were a little skeptical about offering a class to patients that would most likely be talking about religion, faith and spirituality. A couple of us were (and still are) convinced that spirituality cannot be overlooked when addressing someone’s overall mental health.

First things first (before we get to the goods), what is relationship anxiety? Well, it’s a tendency to struggle with commitment in the face of what would be deemed a fairly stable and solid relationship. That’s the simple way of seeing it. It can also be more extreme in that a person can either focus on their partner (i.e. partner-focused) or their relationship (i.e. relationship-focused).

Critics of sexual addiction often accuse sex addiction treatment of promoting homophobia. One basis for these arguments comes from the 12-step support group, Sexaholics Anonymous (SA). This group describes “healthy” sexual behavior as being between a man and a woman.

A while back, I had read a book by Augusten Burroughs, titled “This is How: Help for the Self,” (2012). One thing that had stuck with me is a passage about how people are looking for happiness from external things.

As counselors, one of our main goals, if not the goal, is to encourage our clients to work towards their own self-development and to help them learn the necessary skills for them to do this on their own.

Above is a list that I borrowed from an All Pro Dads Blog in which the author noted 72 things he wanted his sons to learn and reflect upon as they matured into young adults. I pared it down to 21 of which I believe have more salience in my experiences.

In the sex therapy community, sex addiction is one of the most controversial topics. Some professionals see validity in labeling compulsive sexual behavior as an addiction. Others identify that some people are contending with a problem with sexual behavior that is out of control.

Something I got told a lot in graduate school was that self-care was paramount. We talked about all our self-care efforts during practicum and internship. We had to journal some of those efforts. While taking care of myself is important to my success in helping care for others (whether they’re my clients or my kids), I’ve also realized that I won’t self-care or “professional distance” my way into total prevention of compassion fatigue.

Our brains are wired to notice what is wrong in our environment. That’s intended to be for our survival, but it means we are primed to think negatively. We really have to work to create a positive outlook! So you’ll want to practice, practice, practice this Toolkit for Transformation strategy.

There is something about a sunrise that I appreciate more than a sunset. A sunrise illuminates a new day of promise and potential. I’ve seen sunrises all around the world, and when I take the time to appreciate them, I’m able to recognize the joy of a new day.